A Perfect Grand Lake Weekend In Review by The Grand Lake Bum

Did you enjoy summer last Saturday? Wowzer.  Golf courses full of people – boats on the water – folks jogging and riding around in golf carts with shorts on – motorcycles on the roads - rich guys riding around in convertibles – drinking and smoking on the patio at The Shebang - it was awesome! It was really nice of Mother Nature to break up the winter with that little one-day preview of summertime fun on Grand. It was perfect timing for me – it was just a little warmer here on Saturday than it was in the Bahamas where a bunch of my friends arrived that day. I think we ought to start a Grand Lake petition to God for a new weather pattern.  Instead of having summer weather for four months or so, I propose we split the seasons differently. Let’s have winter on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday – and summer on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday year round. I think that’s a much smarter way to divide the seasons.

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In the meantime, the Oklahoma legislature is in session. Watch out! Remember last fall when voters overwhelmingly voted to make possession of minor drugs a misdemeanor? And remember we also voted to take the savings and invest it in mental health and rehab? Not everybody thinks the people know best. State Senator Ralph Shortey is pushing legislation to repeal everything the people voted to approve. He says we didn’t know what we were voting for. Hmm. I think the Tulsa World summed it up better than anything I could think up – the headline on their editorial read “Legislators to the People: Sit down and be quiet.” C’mon, man.

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State Representative Travis Dunlap has proposed a new law to make it more difficult to get a divorce.  He says since most people cite “incompatibility,” we should do away with it as a reason for divorce if couples have children, or have been married more than 10 years, or if one of them objects. It’s an interesting thought to pass a law trying to force two people together when they want to be apart. I think he’ll probably find out people cite “incompatibility” because the real reason is too embarrassing.

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Oh, boy. We have a new source of embarrassment for Oklahoma. It’s a new Bravo Network “reality show” called Sweet Home Oklahoma. The half-hour unscripted comedy show is produced by the same production company that brought us all the “Real Housewives of…” crap; so that’ll give you an idea how we look. It centers around the daily perils of being a crank, rich, selfish, privileged resident of Nichols Hills in the OKC metro. The series premiers with back-to-back episodes March 20 at 9:00 on Bravo. God help us.

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I’ve heard of people who love Girl Scout cookies, but this is ridiculous. At an Ardmore shopping mall, 45-year-old Jerry Warren approached some Girl Scouts and offered to trade vodka for the cookies. He must have been really drunk if he was willing to give up vodka for cookies. Fortunately, the Girl Scouts didn’t want the vodka as bad as Jerry wanted the cookies…or as bad as the police department wanted Jerry in the pokey.

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Professor Irwin Corey died last week at the age of 102. If you didn’t see him repeatedly on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, you missed some great entertainment. I’ve always loved the title he gave himself – “The World’s Foremost Authority.” Now that he’s gone, I think I’ll take on that title.  It fits, don’t you think?

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Responding to a New York Times report that President Trump wanders alone through the White House in his bath robe, White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer said “the President doesn’t even own a robe.” YIKES! So what, if anything, is he wearing while he wanders alone through the White House? I sure hope it’s not the same situation with everyone named “Donald.” I hope he doesn’t wander around wearing a shirt, but no pants like Donald Duck.

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Preston Kelley lives in Alabama, but his grandmother received a picture of him that seemed to indicate he was being held captive in the woods of Tennessee. His message said if she didn’t send him a $1,000 moneygram, he would not be released. Instead of sending the money, she went to the police who arrested Kelley on charges of trying to extort his grandmother. He’s being held, ironically, on $1,000 bond. So…I guess his message about not being released unless his grandmother sends him $1,000 is now true. Does that mean there’s no crime now?

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I have often quoted various studies indicating that exercise might not, in fact, be good for you; but now there is proof. Don McNelly of New York talked often about his passion for running – and last Sunday, he died. Admittedly, it took a while. He ran in 744 marathons, and when he died, he was 96; but still…

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Alec Baldwin is getting really, really good at his impression of President Trump on Saturday Night Live. Too good, maybe. A front page story about Trump and Israel in the Dominican Republic newspaper El Nacional mistakenly used a photo of Baldwin (in character) instead of Trump. Thanks to The Donald for making Saturday Night Live great again!

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GRAND LAKE DINING NEWS: The much anticipated opening of 1909 at 3^rd & Main in Grove is here (and it’s a really cool place with great food)! Roadhouse 125 on Monkey Island is now planning an April 1 opening.

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BEST FACE BOOK POST THIS WEEK: My boss told me “Dress for the job you want, not the job you have.” Now I’m sitting in a disciplinary meeting dressed as Wonder Woman.

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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK (in front of The Office, a strip club on Monkey Island): “Boobs & Beer. No cover.” LOL. That’s the idea, right?

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LEGAL TIP OF THE WEEK (from Josh Davis): If you’re going to get pulled over for a DUI, and try to tell the cop that you haven’t been drinking, try not to throw up on them.

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week to Rich Talley, Bob Corlett, Lisette Coston, Blake Keeton, Roy Green, Ainslee Stanford II, Zach Roach, Angelic Sanchez-Peetoom, Tyler Carson, Todd Gayer, Jim Wyche, Bill Oden, and Bob Howard.

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK:  Just west of Big Cabin, there is a sign for eastbound traffic notifying travelers there are “Free Restrooms 7 Miles Ahead.” Are there restrooms somewhere that charge you to go?

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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There are plenty of entertainment options around the lake this weekend, including Clint Walker live in the Back Stage Room Friday night and Randy Lunsford performing through the weekend in the Burlesque Room at The Shebang. Friday night is karaoke night at Monkey Island Pub, and there’s always great live entertainment on the weekends at the Road Hog Saloon. On South Grand Lake, Without Warning will be on stage Saturdaynight at Pickles at the Lake just north of Langley.

Area casinos have excellent musical options this weekend, as well. At Downstream Casino’s Legend Sports Bar Retrorockerztake the stage Friday night, with Mr. Lucky wrapping up the weekend Saturday night. Howard Gayles will be in the Lover’s Leap Lounge both Friday & Saturday nights. FM Live will perform atop the 1897 Bar at Cherokee Casino Grove’s 1897 BarFriday night, followed by Reverse Reaction Saturday night. At Wyandotte Casino’s Club 60 West Bar, The Mixtapes Band will perform Friday night. Buffalo Run Casino’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill features great music from 151 both Friday & Saturdaynights. At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar starting Thursday night with music by Joe Giles & the Homewreckers. Friday night, The Bobby D Band will entertain, followed by 90lb. Wrench Saturday night. If live stand-up comedy is more your style, The Lu Tang Clan is back by popular demand Saturday night at the Loony Saloon at The Stables Casino.

The best spots to catch all your favorite sports action, including NBA & college basketball, and PGA Golf are the Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Road Hog Saloon, and Pickles at the Lake in Langley.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: The series premiere of The Good Fight is Sunday night at 7:00 on CBS. The 5^th and final season ofBates Motel starts Monday night at 9:00 on A&E.

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Disney’s Newsies, the Broadway Musical, The Great Wall and In Dubious Battle

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “One of the scariest things about the Oklahoma budget crisis is that we’re forced to rely on the same people who helped caused the problem to somehow fix it. It’s a scary proposition. It would be like going back to the same bad plastic surgeon who botched your Botox injections for a brow lift. It’s probably not going to end well.” – Patrick, The Lost Ogle

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SAVE THE DATE: Saturday, February 25-March 11 (Fri. & Sat. at 7:30; Sundays at 2:00) – Grove Playmakers presents live production of W:T. Saturday, February 25 – Mardi Gras Parties at Big Shots (with street performers), Monkey Island Pub, and the Summit at Shangri-La (with a Cajun Buffet). Friday-Sunday, March 3-5 – Welcome Back Weekend on Grand Lake!Thursday-Sunday, March 9-12 – Grand Lake Boat Show at Grove Civic Center. Friday & Saturday, March 24-25 – Grove Area Merchants Association Spring Open House.

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It’s All-Star Weekend in the NBA with the last regular season game of the week being Thursday night at Chicago hosts Boston at 7:00 on TNT. Friday night is the All-Star Celebrity Game (6:00 on ESPN), Saturday night is the skills competition including three-point shooting and slam dunk competition (7:00 on TNT), and Sunday night is the 2017 NBA All-Star Game (7:00 on TNT).

College basketball has some really good games this week, including some doozies in Big 12 competition. Baylor hosts KansasSaturday at noon on CBS – and Saturday night is another edition of Bedlam Basketball as the Cowboys host the Sooners at7:00 on ESPNU. Tulsa will be at Cincinnati Saturday morning at 11:00 (ESPNU)

On the PGA Tour, it’s off to Pacific Palisades, California for the Genesis Open. Coverage begins at 1:00 Thursday & Friday andnoon Saturday & Sunday on the Golf Channel. CBS picks up coverage of the final two rounds at 1:30 Saturday & Sunday.

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After a little mid-week cool spell, the Grand Lake weather for the upcoming weekend looks really nice again. We’ll have sunshine and mid-to-upper 60s for high temperatures all weekend with sunshine and light winds. This is my kind of February! Get out and have some fun; but wherever you decide to play, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you.  It could be me. 

GRAND LAKE BUM 

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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

1909 in Downtown Grove

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Bobbers Café in Langley

Book ‘ems at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patios)

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Café Italia on Monkey Island

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island

Chickanella’s in Grove

Chicken Coop West of Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Coffee Shelter in Ketchum

Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Vinita (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Bar & Grill in Raper Hollow

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Book ‘ems Restaurant & Pub at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Pit Stop Café in Grove

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove

Wyandotte Nation Casino at Twin Bridges (smoking)