December 31 Random Observations of The Grand lake Bum

I decided I love Christmas and New Year’s being on Tuesday. Thursday would be just as good, I guess. Wednesday is confusing – but with the actual holiday on Tuesday or Thursday, there’s no doubt at all about that four-day weekend! We’re wrapping up the big Christmas/New Year’s celebration and the college football bowl season…so we should start seeing Valentine’s Day crap in the stores any minute, now.

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I wasn’t going to have any serious New Year’s Resolutions this year, but I saw a statistic that said the average American has sex 89 times a year. I’m finally feeling motivated about a resolution!

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This week is the official start of “I’ll pay you back when I get my tax refund” season.

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A guy named Innocent Bradley may not be so innocent. Staffers in a Phoenix dental office thought it was strange that Bradley continually booked at least five dental appointments over two months for insignificant work. But he always spent a lot of time in the restroom. Some days, he came to the office without an appointment – just to use the restroom. Sure enough, authorities discovered a small motion activated video camera secretly installed in the restroom. Innocent is headed to court this week to see if he really is. He probably just wanted to make sure everyone’s teeth looked good, don’t you think?

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71-year-old Frenchman Jean-Jacques Savin hopped in his specially equipped 10-foot X 7-foot barrel, rolled it into the sea and plans to allow ocean currents alone to carry him 2,800 miles to the Caribbean as part of a study of ocean currents. The barrel might be big enough to make the trip, but I guess we’ll see if it’s big enough to hold sea-sickness resident from a three month tossing and turning ocean trip.

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I know everyone wants to start the new year by following up old news stories – so ABC interviewed John Wayne Bobbitt last week. He’s the guy whose wife Lorena famously bobbed Bobbit’s penis with a kitchen knife in 1983. Just so you know, Bobbitt told ABC his reattached penis is normal, operating efficiently, and that he has had sex with 70 women since the gruesome incident. In an interview clip ABC released last week, John said, “I don’t want to mess with it. It’s been through the wringer. It’s normal now.” So…now you know.

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Wells Fargo Bank last week agreed to pay $575 million to all 50 states and the District of Columbia as part of a class action suit settlement against claims that it opened 3.5 million new accounts without the knowledge of customers. Earlier in 2018, they paid a $1 billion fine for forcing auto loan customers into buying car insurance and charging unfair fees to mortgage customers. In May, they paid $480 to investors who alleged fraud; and they paid another $65 million in penalties to the State of New York for damage in the incidents. The real crime is that Wells Fargo had a spare $2 billion to pay all those fines, settlements, and penalties for all their other crimes – and it didn’t slow their business down a bit! And guess who went to prison?? Right. Nobody. The rich get richer (although regulators say Wells Farger can’t expand its $2 trillion in assets until regulators decide they are playing nice with their customers).

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 LIFE’S LESSON: A guy walked into a crowded bar, waving his unholstered pistol and yelled, “I have a 45 caliber Colt 1911 with a seven-round magazine plus one in the chamber and I want to know who’s been sleeping with my wife!” A voice from the back of the room called out, “You need more ammo!”

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DEFINITION OF THE WEEK – New Year’s Resolutions: a “to do” list for the first week of January.

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EXTREME HOBBIES: If your parachute doesn’t work, don’t worry. You have the rest of your life to fix it.

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NUTRITION TIP OF THE WEEK: Potatoes make French fries, chips, and vodka. It’s like the other vegetables aren’t even trying!

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BEST FACEBOOK POST OF THE WEEK: I’ve started investing in stocks. Beef, chicken and vegetable. One day I hope to be a bouillonaire.

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RANDY KREHBIEL’S RANDOM FACTOID OF THE WEEK: The abbreviation "lb" is derived from "libra," the Latin word for pound. The stylized "L" denoting the British monetary unit is also an abbreviation of libra.

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SUGGESTION OF THE WEEK: Banks need to get better at stocking ATMs after Christmas. I went to five different ones, and they all had “insufficient funds.”

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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: In dog beers, I’ve only had one.

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TWEET OF THE WEEK: I’d like to thank whomever told my mom that WTF means “Wow, that’s fantastic.” Her texts are so much more fun now.

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FEEL-OLD MOMENTS OF THE WEEK: A three-day music festival has been scheduled for August, 2019 at the Bethel, New York location of the landmark Woodstock Music Festival, celebrating the 50^th Anniversary of Woodstock. Jack Klugman, star of TV’s “The Odd Couple” and “Quincy,” died over the weekend. He was 90 years old.  Also - Ellen DeGeneres turns 61 this month.

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OBSERVATION OF THE WEEK: I still have a land line telephone – or, as I like to call it, “a cell phone finder.”

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy birthday wishes go out this week to Mark Londagin, Steve Cornell, Steve Edwards, Judy Barger, Cheyanna Cookson, Paul Spechler, Sergio Andre, Kent Harrell, Susan Graham, Clifford Smallwood, Carol Cable, Jim Parrish, Tracie Gelinas, Morgan Grubb, and Kendra Sue McGeady.

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: Are there really people out there who get up every morning and make their bed, or is that just a myth?

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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: Wednesday, January 2 – Guest Chef event at The Shebang Restaurant benefits the family of Stella Jacobs. The NCAA Football National Championship Game is next Monday night at 7:00.

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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s plenty of great entertainment coming up around the lake over the weekend. On Monkey Island, Friday night is karaoke night at Monkey Island Pub. At the Blind Swine, there’s live entertainment every Friday and Saturday night (including Erin Fitzgibbon Friday), and KJ Flip hosts karaoke Sunday and Tuesday. At Littlefield Corner, there’s live music every Saturday at the Road Hog Saloon. 

On South Grand Lake, Friday night is Karaoke Night at Michelle’s Bar & Grill at Grand Lodge in Ketchum – and there’s always live entertainment at Michelle’s on Saturday night.

Area casinos have big entertainment plans, too. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, you are the star at Thursday night karaoke. Bobby Degonia entertains at Bordertown Friday night, followed by Duke Mason Saturday. There is live music every Friday night at Grand Lake Casino’s Venue 655. At River Bend Casino’s Club 60 West Bar, RendevouX will perform Friday night. Indigo Sky Casino offers three nights of musical entertainment this week. Brett & Terri perform Thursday and Friday nights in the Echo Bar, followed by The Uncrowned Kings Saturday night.

The best spots to catch all your favorite sports action, including NFL games, the NCAA National Championship game, PGA Golf and college & NBA basketball games are the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Monkey Island Pub, Blind Swine, Road Hog Saloon, 1909 in Grove, Pickles at the Lake in Langley, and Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: One of my very favorite shows airs twice this week. The Season Premiere of The Blacklist airs Thursday night at 9:00 on NBC before moving to its new time slot the very next night, Friday at 8:00. Sunday night, the 76^th Golden Globes Award Show airs live on NBC. Season premieres air simultaneously, Monday night at 7:00 for America’s Got Talent: The Champions (NBC) and The Bachelor (ABC). The debut of the new series Schooled airs Wednesday night at 7:30 on ABC and The Match Game season begins Wednesday night at 9:00, also on ABC.

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Molly’s Game, Devil’s Gate and Insidious: The Last Key

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “Train people well enough so they can leave. Treat them well enough so they don’t want to.” - Sir Richard Branson

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SAVE THE DATE: Friday-Sunday, January 11-13 – OKC Boat Show at the State Fairgrounds in OKC. Friday, January 18 – “Silver Lining” opens at Playmakers in Grove. Saturday, January 26 – Movie Night at Shangri-La Resort. Monday-Sunday, January 28-February 3 – Tulsa Boat, Sport & Travel Show at River Spirit Expo, Tulsa State Fairgrounds. Friday-Sunday, February 8-10 – Grove Home & Garden Show, Grove Civic Center.

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Only one college football game remains. The National Championship game kicks off Monday night at 7:00 on ESPN. Sadly, it does not involve OU. Clemson and Alabama play Monday night for all the marbles.

In the NFL, it’s playoff time! Wild Card games are this weekend – two games Saturday and two Sunday.

There’s great NBA action this week, too. The Thursday night double-header on TNT features Toronto at San Antonio and Houston at Golden State. The OKC Thunder are on the road in Portland Friday night at 9:30 (ESPN). They’re back home on Sunday hosting Washington at 6:00 (FSOK). Tuesday night, Minnesota comes to OKC for a 7:00 p.m. tip-off (FSOK).

College basketball highlights of the week include Wichita State at Memphis Thursday night at 8:00 (CBSSN) and a great Saturday line-up including a Bedlam match-up with OSU at OU at 1:00 (Fox Sports Southwest), Kansas State at Texas Tech (1:00 on ESPNU), Kansas at Iowa State at 4:00 (ESPN2), South Florida at Tulsa at 5:00 (ESPNU) and West Virginia at Texas at 8:00 (ESPN2).  Next Tuesday night, OSU hosts Texas at 6:00 (ESPNU) and OU is at Texas Tech at 8:00 (ESPNews). Kansas hosts TCU Wednesday night at 8:00 (ESPN2)

PGA Players return to the course in Hawaii this week for the Sentry Tournament of Champions. Coverage is on the Golf Channel beginning at 5:00 Thursday & Friday, 2:00 p.m. Saturday, and 5:00 on Sunday.

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The weather for the first weekend of the new year looks great. Look for sunshine and high temperatures in the mid-50s with lows in the mid-30s. It should be great weather for golfers and boaters, alike. Of course, it’s always great for dining & drinking in January, s o, party on! Remember, though…wherever you decide to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me.

GRAND LAKE BUM

 

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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

1909 in Downtown Grove

Ailey’s Café in Langley

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (Open Friday & Saturday nights)

Blind Swine on Monkey Island

Blue Bluff Café at Blue Bluff Harbor

Bobbers Café in Langley

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Café Italia on Monkey Island

Café Yum in Grove

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and at Littlefield Corner

Checkered Past in Grove

Chickanella’s in Grove

Chicken Coop West of Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Coffee Shelter in Ketchum

Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)

Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s on the Lake at Blue Bluff Harbor

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove

Henrie’s Grill in Grove

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Hilltop Café in Grove

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Langley (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Monkey’s Uncle at Littlefield Corner (Breakfast & lunch)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Mulligan’s at Patricia Island Golf Club in Grove

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Pappy’s Bar on Hwy 10 east of Grove

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Pit Stop Café in Grove

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office Gentlemen’s Club on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove