June 25 Random Observations of The Grand Lake Bum

It’s time for a ten-day holiday celebration on Grand Lake – so remember, the Official Lake Bum Holiday Rules are in effect.  No fighting, no puking, no hitting on someone else’s date, no griping at over-worked servers and bartenders, no bragging about how much money you have (or your parents have), no drunk driving, no public nudity (private nudity is okay), no yelling, no discussion of religion - and especially no politics!  As with all summer holiday weekends, you may have a little longer wait for a seat, a drink, or some food. Be nice to everyone who is working so you can play. The population of Grand Lake over the next few days will be equal to the population of the state’s third largest city. If everybody who’s coming to the lake over the next ten days would come every weekend, everybody could staff up for giant crowds. So, maybe you should buy a house and a boat while you’re here and come join us for the party all year!

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If you have animals or children who are afraid of loud noises, you’d better find some good ear plugs. Starting Friday, there are eight official fireworks displays around the lake in nine days. Happy 4^th of July! Over and over and over again.

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My Florida pals say the southern part of the state is starting to look like Jurassic Park! Hundreds of thousands of iguanas are invading Miami-Dade, Broward, and Palm Beach Counties – climbing sea walls, roaming yards and parks and leaving a path of filth and destruction behind. Would you call that “a reptile dysfunction?”

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While everybody has been watching the problems on the southern border of the U.S., there are some goofy things happening up north, as well. 19-year-old Cedella Roman is a citizen of France, but she has been visiting her mother in British Columbia. She went for a jog on the beach and apparently crossed the U.S./Canadian border near Blaine, Washington. Before heading back home, she stopped to take a picture of the beautiful scenery, and that’s when the border agents nabbed her, informed her that she had crossed the border into the U.S., and took her to a detention center in Tacoma. She finally made it back to her mother’s house – but there wasn’t anything quick about it. Apparently the Homeland Security penalty for accidental teenage jogging across an imaginary unmarked line is…two weeks in a jail.

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Have you been watching the FIFA World Cup soccer competition – or “football” as they call it? I heard the team from Nigeria was so disappointed in their play that they actually offered to refund all expenses of their fans who traveled to Russia to watch them. All you need to do is send them your bank details, sort codes, account numbers & PIN numbers, and they will deposit the money directly in your account – direct from Nigeria.

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GRAND LAKE HOLIDAY DINING AND DRINKING TIP: Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina has posted expanded holiday hours. Eddy’s will open at5:00 p.m. Tuesday, July 3 – and will open at 11:00 a.m. Wednesday-Sunday, July 4-8.

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4^th OF JULY SAFETY TIP: Kids, don’t play with fireworks. Let the adults who have been drinking all day set them off.

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BEST FACEBOOK POST THIS WEEK: I hate it when I write a sarcastic Facebook status, and someone who doesn’t speak sarcasm has to comment and ruin it.

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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: WARNING: Deer Baiting is Illegal! This corn pile is intended for squirrels, chipmunks and other such animals. Any deer found eating this corn WILL BE SHOT!

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TWEET OF THE WEEK: I don’t jog, because I’ve watched enough “Law & Order” to know that’s how you end up finding a dead body.

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FEEL-OLD MOMENT OF THE WEEK: OMG, I’m rich! Silver in my hair, gold in my teeth, crystals in my kidneys, sugar in my blood, lead in my butt, iron in my arteries and an inexhaustible supply of natural gas. I never thought I would accumulate such wealth! (thanks for Jimbo Coleman for sharing this one)

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BEST OBSERVATION OF THE WEEK: We can only blame ourselves for all the crime and violence today. We removed all the phone booths and now Superman has nowhere to change.

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy birthday wishes go out this week to Dallas Sorrels, Bobbie Owens, John Jameson, Mary Brewer, Alana Tuder, Marc Still, Alyson Aberle, Bob Beine, Jimbo Coleman, Velma Mullen, and Dick Seybolt.

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: Do gun manuals have a section on trouble shooting?

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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: Grab a tight hold and get a faraway look in your eye. There’s a LOT happening at Grand Lake! Thunder on Wolf Creek boat races are happening Friday-Sunday at Wolf Creek Park in Grove. Friday night is the season-opening of “Damascus Road” at Picture in Scripture Amphitheater (throughAugust 4); and the Huckleberry Festival gets underway in Jay Saturday and runs through July 4. Saturday is also the Summer Fun Fest at Grand Meridian RV, Cabin and Tiny Home Resort. Vinita Fireworks are Friday night (High School Football Stadium), Horse Creek Fireworks are Saturday night, Grove Fireworks at the Wolf Creek Park are Tuesday night – and so are the Grand Lake Fireworks at Disney. Friday night is a “Full Moon Luau” for Cherokee Yacht Club Members. Wednesday night, July 4, is the night for the Duck Creek Fireworks, Miami Fireworks, and Jay Fireworks shows. The Cajun Fest and Arts Festival features crafts, food, and fabulous music from 10-4 Wednesday, July 4 at the Grove Civic Center.

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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s a lot of great entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, Whiskey Poet Societyentertains Saturday night at Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina. You are the star on the Balcony Bar at The Shebang with karaoke fun Friday and Saturdaynights, and the dance floor will be hoppin’ with music by D.J. Deeko right across the street both Friday & Saturday nights at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze. Up highway 125, Friday night is karaoke night at Monkey Island Pub. At the Blind Swine, Erin Fitzgibbon will entertain Friday night, and Christine Jude & the Gentlemen Callerswill be on Stage Saturday night. At Littlefield Corner, the Road Hog Saloon also features live entertainment every Saturday night.

In Grove, the Cajun Festival runs 10-4 on the 4^th of July with music by Chris Miller & Bayou Roots, Clint Walker, The Ragin’ Cajun himself, Doug Kershaw, and Jana Jae.

On South Grand Lake, Friday night is Karaoke Night at Michelle’s Bar & Grill at Grand Lodge in Ketchum – and there’s always live entertainment at Michelle’s on Saturday night.

Friday night, The Agenda will provide the entertainment at Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina, followed by RocKFiscH Saturday night, and a special Tuesday night performance by Donny James July 3. There is always Friday & Saturday night entertainment & karaoke fun on the deck at Juan Montez at Red Arrow Marina; and Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney will feature musical entertainment by Randy Steele Friday night and The Zigs Saturday night. Saturday night is the Summer Fun Fest at Grand Meridian RV, Cabin & Tiny Home Resort with great music from Lickitty Split, Darrel Lee Hopper, and Megan Faulconer. Saturday night is Karaoke Night at Ugly’s Grill & Bar at Thunder Bay Marina.

Area casinos have big entertainment plans, too. Cherokee Casino Grove features The Bobby D. Band Friday night and Mayday by Midnight Saturday night. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, you are the star at Thursday night karaoke. Friday night is music by Lucas Gates; and Runnin’ on Empty entertains Saturday. At River Bend Casino’s Club 60 West Bar, NighTTrain will perform Friday night. At Grand Lake Casino’s Venue 655, Pony Up will be on stage Friday night. Indigo Sky Casino offers three nights of musical entertainment this week. Rackensak performs Thursday night in the Echo Bar, followed by Rocked N’ Loaded Friday night, and The Rumor Saturday.

The best spots to catch all your favorite sports action, including PGA Golf, Major League Baseball, FIFA World Cup Soccer and NASCAR are Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina, Monkey Island Pub, Blind Swine, Road Hog Saloon, 1909 in Grove, and Pickles at the Lake in Langley.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: Season 2 of the comedy series GLOW will be available Friday on NETFLIX. The Season 5 premiere of Power airs Sunday night at 8:00 on Starz; and The Macy’s 4^th of July Fireworks Spectacular airs Wednesday night, July 4 beginning at 7:00 on NBC.

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Sicario: Day of the Soldado and Uncle Drew

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “I have my own remote control, thanks, so need to share videos from your favorite cable news stations. Can I come to your house and change the channel to Sponge Bob?” – Jimmie Tramel

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SAVE THE DATE: Saturday, July 7 – Wolf Creek Nationals, Southern Drag Boat Association at Wolf Creek Park. Saturday, July 7 – Monkey Island Fireworks at Shangri-La. Monday-Wednesday, July 9-11 – Junior Sports Camp at Shangri-La Resort. Saturday, July 21 – Grand Bobber Drop. Saturday, July 21 – Aquapalooza (between the spillways at Disney). Saturday, July 28 – Members Golf Cart Drive-In Movie Night at Shangri-La Golf Club.

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PGA players are in Maryland this week at TPC Potomac for the Quicken Loans National. Coverage begins Thursday and Friday at 2:00 and Saturday & Sunday atnoon on the Golf Channel. CBS picks up the final two rounds Saturday & Sunday at 2:00.

The FIFA World Cup competition moves into the Round of 16 this weekend with matches throughout the day Saturday-Tuesday to complete that round of play. Games are on Fox and Fox Sports 1.

Major League Baseball TV coverage this week includes the L.A. Angels at Boston Thursday night (6:00 on ESPN), Atlanta at St. Louis Saturday night (6:15 on Fox), Red Sox at Yankees Sunday night (7:00 on ESPN), Boston at Washington Monday night (6:00 on ESPN), and a trio of games on the 4^th of July – Baltimore at Philadelphia at 3:00, White Sox at Cincinnati at 6:00, and St. Louis at Arizona at 9:00 – all on ESPN.  

NASCAR drivers are at Chicagoland Speedway Sunday for the Overton’s 400. Coverage starts at 1:30 on NBCSN.

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As we kick off the 10-day Grand Lake Independence Day celebration this weekend, the weather appears to be in a cooperative mood. Sunshine, highs in the mid-90s, lows in the 70s and winds up to 10 MPH is the forecast right now. There’s certainly plenty of fun on the Grand Lake agenda this weekend – both outside and inside. Be safe and have fun. But, remember…wherever you decide to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me.

GRAND LAKE BUM

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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

1909 in Downtown Grove

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Blind Swine on Monkey Island

Blue Bluff Café at Blue Bluff Harbor

Bobbers Café in Langley

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Café Italia on Monkey Island

Café Yum in Grove

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and at Littlefield Corner

Checkered Past in Grove

Chickanella’s in Grove

Chicken Coop West of Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Coffee Shelter in Ketchum

Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)

Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s on the Lake at Blue Bluff Harbor

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Langley (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Monkey’s Uncle at Littlefield Corner (Breakfast & lunch)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Bar & Grill in Raper Hollow

Mulligan’s at Patricia Island Golf Club in Grove

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Pit Stop Café in Grove

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove