May 21 Random Observations of The Grand Lake Bum
It’s holiday weekend time on Grand Lake – so remember, the Official Lake Bum Holiday Rules are in effect this weekend. No fighting, no puking, no hitting on someone else’s date, no griping at over-worked servers and bartenders, no bragging about how much money you have (or your parents have), no drunk driving, no public nudity (private nudity is okay), no yelling, no discussion of religion - and especially no politics! As with all summer holiday weekends, you may have a little longer wait for a seat, a drink, or some food. Be nice. If everybody who’s coming this weekend would come every weekend, everybody could staff up for giant crowds. So, maybe you should buy a house and a boat while you’re here and come join the party all year! By the way, don’t get cranky on your attempt at Sunday morning drinking. Bars & restaurants can’t sell beer until noon and can’t sell liquor until 1:00 on Sundays. Establishments in Mayes and Craig Counties can’t sell liquor on Sunday at all. Don’t be mad. It’s not their fault. It’s the law. We’re trying to correct that situation at the ballot box on June 26. Maybe the 4th of July week will be better. We’re still the biggest party spot in Oklahoma, though! Have fun and remember to leave big tips for the people who are working through the holiday so you can play!
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Okay, on to solving our state’s financial crisis – forever! The U.S. Supreme Court last week struck down the federal ban on state’s legalizing sports betting. I’m not sure I have ever met anyone who didn’t bet on a sporting event now and then. If we legalized that in Oklahoma and taxed it, we would probably make Colorado look like they’re making pocket change off of legalized marijuana. Revenue from sports betting would easily top revenue from casinos, horse race betting and lottery – combined. Seems like an easy budget solution. However, the Vegas book is 35-1 odds against the Oklahoma legislature doing anything about it.
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Did you watch the big wedding Saturday morning? I noticed 73-year-old American Thomas Markle was not at the Royal Wedding Saturday when his daughter, Meghan, married Britain’s Prince Harry. His doctor advised him not to make the trip due to ill health. I’m not sure what his ill health issue is, exactly, but if I were father of the bride and took a peek inside St. George’s Chapel at Windsor Castle, then saw the guest list and the wedding plans – I would go into cardiac arrest for fear that someone might expect the father of the bride to pick up the tab for the gig.
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In Illinois, Brian Morris was a $125 million lottery winner earlier this month – and he made his first wise investment immediately. He ordered $224,000 worth of manure, and had it dumped on the lawn at the home of his former boss. He told police, “I worked for that guy for 17 years and I was treated like S*#t. I had to take it because I needed the money; but now it’s time for revenge.”
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Sometimes crime DOES pay. And well. Disgraced Texas Congressman Blake Farenthold resigned in disgrace a few weeks ago for using public funds to settle a past sexual harassment complaint. Last week, he was hired by the Calhoun Port Authority located in his old district to promote its interests in Washington and “resolve funding issues.” Pay for the little part-time gig? $160,000 per year. SMH
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MEDICAL NEWS OF THE WEEK: Charging $42 for a $28 case of water is price-gouging, right? So why is charging $800 for $8 worth of saline OK?
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BEST FACEBOOK POST THIS WEEK: I’ve been repeating the same mistakes in life for so long now, I’m going to start calling them traditions.
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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: May your life be as awesome as you pretend it is on Facebook.
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TWEET OF THE WEEK: If you call me from a “private number,” I will respect your privacy and not answer.
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FEEL-OLD MOMENTS OF THE WEEK: The movie “Top Gun” was released 32 years ago this week. Tina Turner is 77 years old; and Joan Collins turns 85 this week.
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BEST OBSERVATION OF THE WEEK: I know it’s bikini season, ladies; but you will never look like the girl in the magazine. In fact, the girl in the magazine doesn’t even look like the girl in the magazine.
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PROOF YOU SHOULD STOP TWEETING: President Trump sent out a tweet to welcome the First Lady back to the White House after her hospital stay: “Melanie is feeling and doing really well,” he tweeted. A little later he changed “Melanie” to “Melania.” Oops.
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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy birthday wishes go out this week to Ron Tipton, Jim Richie, Pam Nutting, Todd Mlnarik, Cheryl Ayer, Jim Arnold Sr., Bill Hodge, and Lori Magoulas. Happy wedding anniversary to my buds George and Carol Sherman; and happy 35th wedding anniversary to Val & Nancy Saamer. It’s been 25 years since those two Chicago kids stopped by Monkey Island and forgot to leave. Special congratulations to Shangri-La Resort, honored by the Oklahoma Travel Industry Association last week with its prestigious RedBud Award for “Outstanding Lodging Property in Oklahoma!”
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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: If the people who attended the Royal Wedding Saturday went to the restroom while they were there, would that qualify as a Royal Flush?
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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: There’s something happening everywhere you look this holiday weekend, but there are couple of things to point out. Friday throughMonday is off-road action in the Memorial Day Run at the Pensacola Dam Off-Road Area. Friday night is Indiglo 80s night at Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon. There will be prizes for the best 80s costume.
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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s plenty of great entertainment around for the Memorial Day holiday weekend. On Monkey Island,Whiskey Poet Society will be on stage at Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina. There will three nights of karaoke fun Friday, Saturday and Sunday at the Balcony Bar at The Shebang – and DJs will be rockin’ the dance floor with Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night dancing at Big Shots. Up highway 125, Friday night is also karaoke night at Monkey Island Pub. At the Blind Swine, Erin Fitzgibbon will be on state Friday night, followed by DJ Spin Saturday night and DJ and the Band Sunday. At Littlefield Corner at the entrance to Monkey Island, the Road Hog Saloon also presents live music every Saturday night.
On South Grand Lake, Friday night is Karaoke Night at Michelle’s Bar & Grill at Grand Lodge in Ketchum – and there’s always live entertainment at Michelle’s on Saturday night.
This weekend at Grand Lake RV Park, Lickitty Split will provide Saturday entertainment. Friday night, Brett and Terri will provide the entertainment at Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina, followed by The Rumor Saturday night, and Jesse Joice Sunday night. Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney will feature the acoustical music of Randy Steele Friday night followed by Brett & Terri Saturday night.
Area casinos have big entertainment plans, too. Cherokee Casino Grove features Members Only Friday night followed by Mayday by Midnight Saturday night, and DJ 2 Legit Sunday night. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, you are the star at Thursday night karaoke. Friday night is Indiglo 80’s Night with a special prize for the Best Dressed 80s Costume; and Bobby D entertains Saturday. At River Bend Casino’s Club 60 West Bar, Jesse Joice will perform Friday night; and Grand Lake Casino’s Venue 655 will host The Rosy Hips Friday night and Western Justice Saturday night. Indigo Sky Casino offers three nights of musical entertainment this week.Eddie Valen performs Thursday night in the Echo Bar, followed by 90 lb Wrench Friday night. Saturday night music at Indigo will be provided by The Uncrowned Kings.
The best spots to catch all your favorite sports action, including NBA Playoffs, PGA Golf, the 102nd Indianapolis 500 and NASCAR are Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina, Monkey Island Pub, Blind Swine, Road Hog Saloon, 1909 in Grove, and Pickles at the Lake in Langley.
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BUM MUST-SEE TV: The Red Nose Day special airs Thursday night at 9:00 on NBC. Steve Martin and Martin Short: An Evening You Will Forget for the Rest of Your Life is available on NETFLIX Friday. America’s Got Talent returns Tuesday night at 7:00 on NBC.
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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Solo: A Star Wars Story and Book Club
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “A new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. I’m sure that’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.”
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SAVE THE DATE: Friday & Saturday, June 1-2 – Toes in the Grand Festival at Wolf Creek Park in Grove. Saturday, June 2 – World’s Largest Calf Fry Festival & Cookoff in Vinita. Saturday, June 2 – Free vessel inspections at Tera Miranda Harbor Marina (10-2). Saturday, June 9 – Grand Lake Camp Bandage at Grand Lake RV Park. Saturday, June 9 -0 Home of Hope 50th Anniversary Banquet at Shangri-La. Friday-Saturday, June 15-16 – Vinita Route 66 Festival in downtown Vinita. Saturday, June 23 – 4th Annual Rock the Dock raft-up party at Check-In Bay. Friday, June 29 – Vinita Fireworks (High School Football Stadium). Tuesday, July 3 – Grove Fireworks (Wolf Creek Park) and Grand Lake Fireworks (Disney). Wednesday, July 4 – Duck Creek Fireworks. Saturday, July 7 – Wolf Creek Nationals, Southern Drag Boat Association at Wolf Creek Park. Saturday, July 7 – Monkey Island Fireworks at Shangri-La.
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PGA players are staying in Fort Worth this weekend for the Fort Worth Invitational at Colonial Country Club following on the heels of the AT&T Byron Nelson Classic last week. Coverage is on the Golf Channel at 3:00 Thursday & Friday and at noon Saturday & Sunday. CBS picks up coverage of the final two rounds Saturday & Sunday at 2:00.
NASCAR action comes from Charlotte Motor Speedway for the second week in a row. Coverage of the Coca Cola 600 begins Sunday evening at 5:00 on Fox.
For Indy car fans, it’s the biggest week of the year. Coverage of the 102nd Indianapolis 500 begins at 10:00 Sunday morning on ABC.
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The weather looks fantastic for the holiday weekend ahead – sunny to partly cloudy skies with light winds, high temperatures in the around 90 and lows around 70. We might have a little shower Saturday night to cool things down a little. Welcome to action central. There’s plenty of fun on the Grand Lake agenda this weekend – both outside and inside. But, remember…wherever you decide to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me.
GRAND LAKE BUM
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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area? Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.
1909 in Downtown Grove
American Grill in Grove
Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)
Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley
Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)
Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)
Blind Swine on Monkey Island
Blue Bluff Café at Blue Bluff Harbor
Bobbers Café in Langley
Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)
Café Italia on Monkey Island
Café Yum in Grove
Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)
Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and at Littlefield Corner
Checkered Past in Grove
Chickanella’s in Grove
Chicken Coop West of Langley
Clanton’s Café in Vinita
Coffee Shelter in Ketchum
Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)
Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel
Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina
Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)
Drake’s on the Lake at Blue Bluff Harbor
Drake’s Restaurant in Grove
Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina
Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)
Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove
Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)
Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)
Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)
Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove
High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)
Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)
Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina
Karrie's Kaboose in Langley (smoking)
La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove
Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge
Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum
Los Garcias in Langley
Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove
Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)
Monkey’s Uncle at Littlefield Corner (Breakfast & lunch)
Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)
Morrows Bar & Grill in Raper Hollow
Mulligan’s at Patricia Island Golf Club in Grove
Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove
Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South
Pickles at the Lake in Langley
Pit Stop Café in Grove
Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)
Raggedy’s in Grove
Rancho Viejo in Grove
Riggs & Company in Langley
River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)
Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)
Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)
Scooters in Langley (smoking)
Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)
Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora
Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum
Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)
The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice
The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)
The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)
The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)
The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)
The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)
The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)
Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)
VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)
Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove
Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)
Wolf Creek Diner in Grove
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