May 23 Random Observations of The Grand Lake Bum
Another month is fading into the beautiful Grand Lake sunset, school is out, weather is heating up, grass is green, water is warming up, and the first major holiday of the summer season is here. That means the official Grand Lake Bum Holiday Behavior Rules are in place. No fighting, no puking, no hitting on someone else’s date, no griping at over-worked servers and bartenders, no bragging about how much money you have (or your parents have), no drunk driving, no public nudity (private nudity is okay), no yelling, no discussion of religion - and especially no politics!
As with all holiday weekends, you may have a little longer wait for a seat, a drink, or some food. Be nice to everyone who is working so you can play. The population of Grand Lake over the next few days will be equal to the population of the state’s third largest city. Everyone is understaffed for this weekend. If everybody who’s coming to the lake over the holiday weekend would come every weekend, all the businesses could staff up for those giant crowds. If I get my drink before you do, it’s because I’m there every day all year long. Bartenders already know what I want – and they know I’ll be sitting on the same stool in the winter. So, maybe you should buy a house and a boat while you’re here and come join us for the party all year! If there’s one thing we’ve learned over the past two years, it’s that a lot of us can work from home just fine. It might as well be a Grand Lake home! You’d be surprised how many people have decided to do exactly that.
*****
Oklahoma’s legislature passed the nation’s most restrictive anti-abortion law, banning virtually all abortions beginning “at fertilization.” Watch out for the wild nights, boys. It looks like child support payments should begin “the morning after.”
*****
Lots of Grand Lakers seemed to make their way to the awesome PGA Championship golf tournament in Tulsa last week. I hope you weren’t thirsty. Michelob Ultra: $19. Southern Hills accomplished something at the PGA Championship that I didn’t think anyone could ever do. They made concessions at the Tulsa Boat, Sport & Travel Show look downright reasonably priced!
*****
PGA Championship aftermath. I don’t care what anyone says, John Daly is my hero golfer. As far as I know, his 2008 Wyndham Championship round still represents the record numbers for consumption while playing 18 holes in a Tour event: 6 packs of peanut M&Ms, 0 waters, 12 Diet Cokes, 21 cigarettes.
*****
Stephens County Sheriff Wayne McKinney has been found safe and sound. Deputies began dropping like flies when the Sheriff didn’t show up for work for 90 days. No show. No call. Nobody had seen him or heard from him since he went on vacation. When newspaper reporters tracked him down, he was in Alabama. He said his RV broke down and they had supply chain issues getting parts. Then his dog got sick. Then his wife got sick. Then he got sick. He didn’t call because cell service was bad. That’s the best string of “no show, no call” excuses I’ve heard in a while. As my pals at “The Lost Ogle” put it, “That sounds like either the world’s saddest Toby Keith song or the plot for National Lampoon’s Redneck Vacation.”
*****
GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy birthday wishes go out this week to Cheryl Ayer, Jamie Flud, Kelli Dyer, Lorri Burns-Bacon, Keith Hawk, Brian Mitchell, Jim Arnold, Bill Hodge, Lori Magoulas, Arlene Seybolt, Jon Spence, Ron Griffin, Brinda Russell, and Jim Sellers.
*****
BEST GRAND LAKE EVENTS OF THE WEEK: Aside from the gigantic stack of holiday weekend events, there are lots of other happenings this week. There is a Grand Lake Newcomers Club Luncheon at Indian Hills Thursday (11:30). The South Grand Lake Chamber’s monthly Member Luncheon is also Thursday (11:30). Friday is the Grand Reopening of renovated Honey Creek Landing Marina and Bella Donna’s Restaurant. Friday evening is also the Grove Block Party – and Saturday is the Farmers Market, both at the Grove Community Center.
*****
RANDY KREHBIEL’S RANDOM FACTOID OF THE WEEK: The distance between a person’s eyes is influence by around 400 genetic factors.
*****
FUN FACT OF THE WEEK: Play-Doh was invented in the early 1900s as a wallpaper cleaner. Nobody thought of using it as a kids’ toy until the 1950s.
*****
BEST FACEBOOK POST OF THE WEEK: After 6 weeks, $140 in supplies, and daily watering, we’re only 3 to 4 weeks away from enjoying a single 25-cent vegetable from our garden.
*****
BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: Hangovers are temporary. Epic tales of drunken adventures will live forever.
*****
TWEET OF THE WEEK: I went to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. Anonymous, my ass! I knew everyone there.
*****
BEST PUN OF THE WEEK: I came up with a new dating app idea. You match with people who are on the same meds as you. We’ll call it “Relationscripts.”
*****
UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn’t usually wear any pants?
*****
OBSERVATION OF THE WEEK: Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.
*****
FEEL-OLD MOMENTS OF THE WEEK: Another musical technology era is over. The iPod has done the way of the 8-Track, Cassette, and CD. Apple is no longer making the industry-changing iPod…and I missed the era completely. It came and went so fast, I never owned one.
*****
QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language.” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
*****
BEST WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: It’s Memorial Day Weekend. It’s gonna take a minute to list all your entertainment options! On Monkey Island, Thursday night Karaoke & Shrimp Boil with Jason Morgan kicks off the weekend fun at Doc’s Bar & Grill. Ryan Graham performs at Doc’s Bar & Grill Friday night; and Terry Jordan tickles the ivories both Friday and Saturday nights at The Summit. Eddy’s Lakeside Bar has a four-day line-up with Friday night entertainment by The Jon Moody Band and a rare live performance Saturday night by 5th Element. Torn takes the stage at Eddy’s Sunday night, and Brett & Terri wrap up the holiday weekend with an afternoon performance 2:00-5:00. Thursday night is karaoke night with DJ Mo at the Blind Swine on Monkey Island, and Erin Fitzgibbon entertains early Friday night at the Swine. Kerry Kimmons leads the karaoke fun on the Balcony Bar at The Shebang Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights while DJ K-Bandito provides the dance music all three nights across the street, along with HALO Beat and Kandi Girls Saturday & Sunday – and DJ Triage added to the mix Sunday night at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze; and Saturday is karaoke night at Monkey Island Pub.
On South Grand Lake, Sharky’s Bar at Hammerhead Marina opens the four-day weekend entertainment Friday night with Radio Nation. The True Swagger Band entertains at Sharky’s Saturday night and Empire performs Sunday night, followed by a Monday afternoon show by The Vanessa Oxford Duo. Dustin Moore starts the weekend musical entertainment with karaoke Thursday night at the Drunken Rooster Bar & Grill. Jacob Dement takes over entertainment Friday night followed by RocKFiscH Saturday; and The Stars will be on stage Sunday night at the Rooster. Clint Ingram will be on stage Thursday night at Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney followed by The Bria & Joey Duo Friday and the Absher, Martin & White Trio Saturday. Jake Flint wraps up the weekend Sunday afternoon at 3:00.
In Grove, Twice as Nice Harpists provide the music Friday night at The Regatta. Backwoods Country provides the Saturday night show; and Laron Simpson entertains Sunday night. Following Thursday night karaoke, there is live entertainment by Rackensak Friday night at Venue 655 at Grand Lake Casino followed by more karaoke Saturday night. Bobby DeGonia will be on stage at Cherokee Casino Grove Friday night, followed by D’Elegantz Saturday night.
Indigo Sky Casino this week presents Low Compatability in the Echo Bar Thursday night. Friday night features Constant Chaos, followed by Derryl Perry Saturday; and Coyette and the Haywire Band wraps up the weekend Sunday night. Dokken, George Lynch, and Lita Ford will do a live show Saturday night at The Peoria Showplace at Buffalo Run Casino
*****
DINING AND DRINKING UPDATE: The Balcony Bar at The Shebang is now open with karaoke fun Friday & Saturday nights. Uglys Grill & Bar at Thunder Bay Marina and Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La are open. Big Shots Rhythm & Booze is now open every Friday and Saturday night for music & dancing (and Sunday night this weekend). Bella Donna’s Italian Restaurant at Honey Creek Landing Marina is now open. Forage now has a location for take-and-bake and pantry items at Layk Schoolhouse on Monkey Island.
*****
BUM MUST-SEE TV: Obi-Wan Kenobi is available Friday on Disney+ and Carpool Karaoke: The Series is available on Apple TV+. Norm MacDonald: Nothing Special will be available Monday on NETFLIX. America’s Got Talent returns next Tuesday at 7:00 on NBC.
****
BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Top Gun: Maverick, The Bob’s Burgers Movie, and My Butt Hazza Fever (short) all open in movie theaters Friday.
*****
SAVE THE DATE: Friday, June 3 – Grove Chamber Eggs & Issues Legislative Breakfast at St. Andrews Episcopal Church (8:00 a.m.). Friday, June 3 – First Friday Wine Share at Forage in Grove (6:00). Friday & Saturday, June 3-4 – Farmers Market at Grove Community Center. Saturday, June 4 – Monkey Island Scavenger Hunt & Auction at The Shebang benefiting 2nd Chance Pet Rescue (11:00 a.m.) Saturday, June 4 – Afton Summer Car Show on Main Street, Afton (9:30-3:00). Saturday, June 4 – Camp Bandage at Grand Lake RV Park (11:00 a.m.). Saturday, June 4 – NAPA Nights fundraising dinner at the South Grand Lake Regional Airport. Monday-Wednesday, June 6-8 – Youth Tennis Camp at The Anchor Racquet Club at Shangri-La. Friday-Sunday, June 10-12 – Toes in the Grand Festival and Boat Races at Wolf Creek Park in Grove. Friday, June 10 – Barkaritaville at Honey Creek Landing Marina. Saturday, June 11 – Bobberland Cove Concert (1:00). Thursday, June 16 – Grove Chamber Business After Hours at Bella Donna’s (5:00 p.m.). Friday, June 17 – Monthly Sunset Cruise at Shangri-La Marina. Monday-Wednesday, June 20-22 – Junior Players Academy at Shangri-La Golf Club. Friday, June 24 – South Grand Lake Chamber of Commerce Golf Tournament at Shangri-La. Friday-Sunday, June 24-26 – Grand Jam Music Fest at Grand Meridian RV Resort. Monday-Wednesday, June 27-29 – Youth Pickleball Camp at The Anchor Racquet Club at Shangri-La.
*****
In the sports world, it’s one of the biggest auto racing weekends of the year. Coverage of the Indianapolis begins at 10:00 Sunday morning on NBC. NASCAR drivers are in Charlotte this holiday weekend for The Coca Cola 600. Coverage begins at 5:00 Sunday on Fox.
The NBA Playoffs are moving toward the final two! Conference Championship series continue this week, as long as it takes for someone to win four games – but no later than next Monday night. The NBA Championship Finals begin next Thursday, June 2.
The same is true of the National Hockey League Playoffs. They’re just not quite as far along as the NBA. Round 2 continues, as necessary, through Monday, with Round 3 set to begin Wednesday, June 1.
PGA Golfers compete this week in The Charles Schwab Challenge. Coverage begins on the Golf Channel at 3:00 Thursday & Friday, 1:00 Saturday, and noon Sunday. CBS picks up the final two rounds beginning at 4:30 Saturday and 2:00 Sunday.
USFL action has all eight teams on the field this week with games Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.
It’s Big 12 Championship tournament time for baseball with games scheduled Wednesday-Sunday to determine the championship team in a conference packed with great ones.
On the heels of last weekend’s NCAA Regionals in the Softball Championship Tournament, Super Regionals are this week with games Thursday-Sunday on the networks of ESPN. The Women’s College World Series is scheduled to follow beginning Thursday, June 2.
*****
After a few days of unseasonably cool weather, both the temperatures and the wind will jump up a little for the holiday weekend. We’ll start out with high temps around 80 and Friday night low around 60 before climbing up to highs pushing 90 and lows around 70 for the rest of the weekend. It might be a little breezy Sunday & Monday, but not enough to mess up any outdoor fun. There’s a lot going on, so get out there and have some Grand Lake fun! Remember, though, no matter where you decide to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me!
GRAND LAKE BUM
Want more information on advertisers you see in the Grand Lake Bum? No problem. Just click on their ad and you will be connected to their website. If you would like to join the growing list of sponsors of The Grand Lake Bum e-blast and the Bum’s page on both Grand Lake Living and www.360grandlake.com, the cost is only $50 a week and the list of readers is growing. E-mail or contact grandlakebum@gmail.com to sign up. The Grand Lake Bum column is also published in The Grand Laker newspaper.
Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area? Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake
Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley
Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)
Bella Donna’s at Honey Creek Landing Marina
Big Shots on Monkey Island (Open Friday & Saturday nights)
Blind Swine on Duck Creek at Safe Harbor Harbors View Marina
Blind Swine on Monkey Island
Blue Bluff Café at Blue Bluff Harbor
Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island
Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)
Café at Har-Ber Village
Café Yum in Grove
Cafeteria at The Layk Schoolhouse on Monkey Island
Cesar’s Place in Vinita
Cesar’s Place in Langley
Changos Locos at Littlefield Corner, Monkey Island
Checkered Past in Grove
Chickanella’s in Grove
Chicken Coop West of Langley
Clanton’s Café in Vinita
Copper Penny Bar in Ketchum
Copper’s Tea and Coffee House in Grove
Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)
Cove Club in Langley
Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel
Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina
Domino’s in Grove
Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)
Drake’s on the Lake at Blue Bluff Harbor
Drake’s Restaurant in Grove
Drunken Rooster Bar & Grill at Grand Meridian
Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina (smoking)
Forage in downtown Grove
Galley at The Anchor, Shangri-La Resort
Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)
Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)
Grand Lake Coffee Company in Grove
Grand Lake Public House in Grove
Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove
High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)
Honey Creek BBQ in Grove (south of Honey Creek bridge)
Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)
Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina
La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove
Lester’s Third Street Diner in Grove
Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum
Los Garcias in Langley
Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove
Marina’s Place at Littlefield Corner
Matt’s Place in Grove
Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)
Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)
Monkey Grind at Shangri-La Resort Hotel
Monkey Island Trail Rides
Monkey Island Winery
Mulligan’s at Patricia Island Golf Club in Grove
Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove
Pappy’s Bar on Hwy 10 east of Grove
Pickles at the Lake in Langley
Pistol Pat’s on Honey Creek in Grove
Pit Stop Café in Grove
Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)
Raggedy’s in Grove
Rancho Viejo in Grove
Riggs & Company in Langley
River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)
Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)
Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)
Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)
Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)
Sugar Shack at Lee’s Grand Lake Resort
Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island
The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice
The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)
The Regatta in Grove
The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)
The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)
Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)
VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)
Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove
Wolf Creek Diner in Grove
Comments:
Map It
