Perfect Grand Lake Summer In Review by The Grand Lake Bum

It seems like just one perfect summer weekend after another on Grand this time of year. It’s a good thing the forecast is nice for the weekend ahead – Aquapalooza, GLOC Shootout Performance Boat Challenge, Oklahoma Legislative Golf Tournament – there’s plenty of outdoor activity to entice more visitors to Oklahoma’s most spectacular playground. I’m glad you’re here – but I’m especially glad I’m here!

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Things don’t always go perfectly according to plan – even at Disneyland where tourists suddenly reported being hit by feces. After a hazardous materials team was dispatched to find out what was causing the bathroom bombing, they discovered the problem was not plumbing, at all. It was an unusually large flock of geese flying overhead with a little “bombing” exercise of their own. Ewwww!

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Maybe it’s just because they have more people, but it seems the weirdest things happen to people in Florida. Robert Dreyer was celebrating his 89^th birthday when he crashed his car into a fire hydrant in Viera, Florida. He wasn’t hurt in the wreck, but when he stepped from his car, the water pressure from the broken hydrant pushed him into the hole created by the collision…and he drowned. Perhaps that lifejacket thing isn’t just about boats, anymore.

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That North Korean test of an intercontinental ballistic missile could have gone way wrong. Video of the launch shows North Korean Leader Kim Jong Un strolling around the launch site smoking a cigarette within a couple of feet of the liquid fueled rocket engine. Liquid rocket fuel is incredibly flammable and can be volatile, even in a controlled environment. We almost didn’t have to worry about Kim Jong Un anymore. Maybe next time. It goes to show – you can’t fix stupid even if it’s in charge of an entire country.

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CREATIVE CRIMINAL REPORT: It happened in Gillette, Wyoming where Marie Cormaney almost made it out of Wal-Mart with $2,000 worth of goodies without paying. The operative word, of course, is “almost.” She told authorities it was part of a college project in which she was studying kleptomania. I suppose that would explain all the other stolen stuff the cops found in her dorm room…but the fact that she was only enrolled in a biology class doesn’t make it clear what she was going to do with the results of her “study.” Anyway, the friendly cops gave her a quiet place to study.

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I don’t know why it takes so long for the handful of good laws approved by the legislature to take effect. It doesn’t become law of the land until November, but Oklahoma finally has a new law making it a $235 fine to drive in the left lane of a highway for any reason other than passing another vehicle. It’s long overdue. I got tickled at a sign I saw in another state that is obviously full of drivers as frustrated as I am. The official overhead highway sign read, “If there are cars behind you and no cars in front of you – get out of this lane.”

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There’s a new definition of “appropriate attire” for women. At least that’s the case in the lobby outside U.S. House Speaker Paul Ryan’s office. Female members, media staffers, and visitors are banned from the Speaker’s lobby if they are wearing sleeveless dresses or blouses, or open-toed shoes. That makes sense. I’m sure that’s one of the biggest problems facing the country, right?

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Oklahoma Congressman Markwayne Mullin says he’ll run for a fourth term despite his long-time pledge to not serve more than three terms. He says “conditions have changed.” I’m thinking the condition that changed is his personal perception of those six years in office that will soon be behind him instead of in front of him.

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Forbes Magazine has released rankings for the best airlines in the U.S. It might be a little harder to board the best airline around here. It’s Alaska Airlines followed by Delta, Virgin America, Jet Blue, and Hawaiian Airlines.

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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: Evil queens are just Disney princesses who worked in Customer Service too long.

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BEST FACEBOOK POST THIS WEEK: “Fidget Spinners are so dumb and pointless,” says the generation that bought 1.5 million Pet Rocks.

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T-SHIRT MESSAGE OF THE WEEK: I have the right to remain silent. I just don’t have the ability.

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LEGAL TIP OF THE WEEK: Telling your employer that you had really sweaty sex with a doper is probably not gonna help explain your positive drug test.

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week to Kasidy Jeffers, Kelly Aberle, John McFerron, Tyler Busch, John Moore, Tina Tolleson, Tony Russell, Tevarhee Brackin, Judy Florida, Carolyn Frans, Erik Altom, Diane Athey, Pam Hart, Jimmy Young, Tammy Altman, Joe Carter, Bobby Stem, Erin Davis, Bill Flegler, Gary Gilstrap, Carolyn Cavins, Lauren Musgrove, Sharon Burnett, and Bailey Stanphill.

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK:  If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?

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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: It’s a really, really big weekend on Grand Lake. The festivities surrounding the GLOC Shootout 2017 Performance Boat Challenge get underway Thursday and continue through Sunday (races are near Sailboat Bridge Saturday 11-5 and Sunday 10-4). The Oklahoma Legislative Grand Lake Retreat begins Thursday and continues through Saturday with the Legislative Golf Tournament set for Friday morning at Shangri-La. We’re also happy to have the braniacs from the Oklahoma Academy brainstorming at the lake this week. Saturday is the big Aquapalooza Grand Lake raft-up event in Horse Creek, the Shangri-La Men’s Golf Association One-Man Scramble, and the Shangri-La Women’s Golf Association Horse Race. Saturday night is the Pirates & Wenches Costume Party at Monkey Island Pub and the Grand River Monsters Bowfishing Tournament out of Martin Landing on Monkey Island. If you would like to help keep the place clean and nice for visitors, Saturday is also an official GRDA Shoreline Clean-up Day!

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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s great entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, you provide a big part of the entertainment at The Balcony Bar at The Shebang, with Friday and Saturday night karaoke. Downstairs in the Burlesque Room, Randy Lunsford provides the weekend entertainment; and across the street at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze, enjoy all the best dance tunes Friday & Saturday nights with DJ Deeko. There’s great Saturday night entertainment at Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina with 5^th Element on stage Saturday night. Just down the highway from there, Friday night is Karaoke Night at Monkey Island Pub, and Saturday night is the Pub’s big Pirates & Wenches Costume Party with fabulous music by DJMO. A little further down the road, there’s always great live weekend entertainment at the Road Hog Saloon.

On South Grand Lake, Friday night’s entertainment is Mike Barham and Acoustic Jam at Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina.Saturday night, Sharky’s will host RPM. At Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney, Kenny Babb will perform Saturday night.

Area casinos have excellent musical options this weekend, as well. The fun starts Thursday night at Downstream Casino’s Legends Sports Bar with a performance by Ray Charles & Company. Friday night, Brent Giddens & the VCR Band will take the stage, followed by the Mark Chapman Band Saturday night. Friday night is live Shobox Boxing at Buffalo Run Casino’s Peoria Showplace. The fight card, headlined by the Four-State Franchise, will be televised worldwide! Buffalo Run’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill will host DJ Leo Friday night and Wicked Season Saturday night.  Cherokee Casino Grove will feature Rod Robertson Friday night and Wilbur Lee Tucker Saturday night. At River Bend Casino in Wyandotte, Club 60 West spotlightsThe Band DeLorian Friday night. At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar starting Thursday night with music by Honkytonk Renovators. Friday night features the music of Donnie Ray Stephens followed by Sweet Trouble Saturdaynight.

The best spots to catch all your favorite sports action, including Wimbledon, NASCAR and PGA Golf are Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina, Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Road Hog Saloon, 1909 in Grove, and Pickles at the Lake in Langley.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: The season 7 premier of Suits is Thursday night at 8:00 on USA. The series premier of Friends from College is available Friday night on NETFLIX. The season 7 premier of  Game of Thrones is on HBO Sunday night at 8:00; and the season premiere of Shooter is Tuesday night at 9:00 on USA.  

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Lady MacBeth, and Blind

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “I worry that the North Korean crisis will distract Trump from the threat of Joe and Mika.” – Andy Borowitz

 

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SAVE THE DATE: Saturday, July 22 – Bobber Drop. Monday-Tuesday, July 24-25 – Tri-State Women’s Championship Golf Tournament at Shangri-La Golf Club. Saturday, August 5 – Boats, Bikes, Bikinis & BBQ at Arrowhead Yacht Club. Friday-Sunday, August 18-20 – Thunder on Wolf Creek (boat races). Saturday, August 19 – Barkarita (fundraising party for Second Chance Pet Rescue) at Honey Creek Landing in Grove. Saturday, August 19 – Roaring 20’s Costume Party at Monkey Island Pub.

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The PGA Tour heads to Illinois and TPC Deere Run this week for the John Deere Classic. Coverage on the Golf Channel begins at 3:00 p.m. Thursday & Friday, and noon Saturday & Sunday. CBS picks up the final two rounds Saturday & Sunday at2:00.

The Senior Players Championship Tournament is also this week. Coverage on the Golf Channel is a 12:30 Thursday & Fridayand 2:00 Saturday & Sunday.

Wimbledon Tennis wraps up this week. The women’s semi-finals are Thursday with men’s semi-finals Friday. The women’s Championship match is Saturday and the men’s final is Sunday. Coverage begins daily at 8:00 a.m. on ESPN.

NASCAR drivers are in New Hampshire this weekend for Overton’s 301. Coverage starts at 2:00 Sunday afternoon on NBCSN.

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Weather for the weekend ahead looks terrific for the myriad of outdoor events at Grand Lake this week. Look for mostly sunny skies with highs in the low to mid 90s and nighttime lows in the low 70s. Get out and enjoy all Grand Lake has to offer, but remember, wherever you decide to play, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you.  It could be me. 

GRAND LAKE BUM

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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

1909 in Downtown Grove

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Blind Swine on Monkey Island

Bobbers Café in Langley

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Café Italia on Monkey Island

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island

Chickanella’s in Grove

Chicken Coop West of Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Coffee Shelter in Ketchum

Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)

Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s on the Lake at Blue Bluff Harbor

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Langley (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Monkey’s Uncle at Littlefield Corner (Breakfast & lunch)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Bar & Grill in Raper Hollow

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Pit Stop Café in Grove

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Roadhouse 125 on Monkey Island (smoking deck)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove