August 11 Observations of The Grand Lake Bum

The last big raft-out and on-the-water concert of the season is in the books. Congratulations to all involved in the 2025 Woodstock on the Water celebrating Grand Lake’s 85th birthday! What an unbelievable crowd at the raft-up Saturday. Don’t start winding down, though. It’s almost time to turn the calendar page to the best two months of boating on the lake. September & October – THIS is the place to be!

*****

I saw a social media post this week that said, “84 beers, minus your age, plus 40 will give you the year you were born.” I’m not sure if that’s true or not. I’m only one-third of the way through the 84 beers and I’m already having a lot of trouble with the math.

*****

I don’t know if you can pull this off or not, but you might try it next time you get stopped by the cops. It happened in Paducah, Kentucky. 82-year-old Ethel Mae Connelly led cops on a high speed chase in her Buick, sometimes hitting 87 miles per hour. She refused to pull over for nearly 15 minutes, instead, waving out the window. When she finally stopped, she told officers she got confused after taking a new medication and mistook the flashing lights on the cop car for a parade in her honor. She was released shortly thereafter, but warned officers, “Next time, I’m bringing the Oldsmobile!”

*****

ALERT! Even if you live on Monkey Island, don’t hide a chimp in your basement. Camden County, Missouri resident Tonia Haddix was featured in the HBO series “Chimp Crazy,” so PETA filed a complaint and the feds came calling. When federal authorities questioned her about chimp “Tonka” with whom she was apparently obsessed. Her first mistake was lying to a federal judge, telling him Tonka had died. When they found him in her basement, she was charged with perjury and obstructing justice for not telling authorities the chimp was in her basement. She was sentenced to almost four years in prison.

*****

In an unrelated case, a Wyandotte couple pleaded guilty to child neglect charges for neglecting their mentally challenged child. They were sentenced to 18 months. Four years for hiding a chimp. 18 months for neglecting a child. The justice system doesn’t always make sense.

*****

If you’re traveling to and from Monkey Island for the next few months, be aware that ODOT is working on a project to widen the causeway bridge. It doesn’t seem to be too much of a traffic problem…yet, anyway…but be alert.

*****

GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy birthday wishes go out this week to Grand Lakers Heather Cole, Bill Wolfe, Jim Timberlake, Gloria Martin, Candi Bullard, Savannah Brown, Matt Pinnell, Sandye Berga, Cheryl Dalton, Alisha DiMaggio, Lynda Fleming, Mike Hegeman, Debi Saied, Haley Vaughn, and Debra Putman.

*****

BEST GRAND LAKE EVENTS THIS WEEK: Friday is the much-anticipated Mary Moore Charity Golf Tournament at Shangri-La Resort. Friday evening is also another awesome Sunset Cruise from Shangri-La Marina (7:00-9:00 p.m.). Friday-Sunday is the big Back to School Bash Fun Run at the off-road area at Disney. Farmers Market is Saturday morning on the Downtown Square in Grove. Saturday is also a Spirit Fair at Rustic and Rebellious in Grove (11:00-4:00); and Saturday night is Cruise Night in Grove!

*****

RANDY KREHBIEL’S FACTOID OF THE WEEK: Known for his long associations with John Wayne and directors John Ford and Frank Capra, crusty character actor Ward Bond appeared in around 200 movies, including seven on the American Film Institute’s 100 greatest list – more than any other actor. He also appeared in 13 movies nominated for Best Picture Oscars.

*****

FUN FACT OF THE WEEK: The Central Park in New York City is larger than the entire country of Monaco.

*****

ODD FACT OF THE WEEK: Elephants are strong long-distance swimmers, capable of swimming for up to six hours and covering 25 miles. Their buoyancy allows them to float and rest without sinking, and they use their trunks as snorkels while diving.

*****

BEST FACEBOOK POST OF THE WEEK: School starts back this week. I better not hear “my stomach hurts” once this school year, ‘cause your stomach wasn’t hurting during the summer while eating 30 bags of chips and staying up until 3:00 a.m.

*****

WORD OF THE WEEK: “Askhole” – a person who constantly asks for advice then does the opposite of what you told them.

*****

BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK (seen on a golf course): Players Must Put Out on the 18th hole. (WHAT????)

*****

BEST BLUESKY POST OF THE WEEK: My therapist told me I needed to write letters to those who have wronged me and toss them in the fire. I said, “Okay, but what do I do with the letters?”

*****

PUN OF THE WEEK: Making a boat out of stone would be a real hardship.

*****

UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: Why are there no “B” batteries?

*****

OBSERVATION OF THE WEEK: It may be true that money can’t buy happiness, but I think it’s only fair to give me a chance to learn that lesson for myself. If it doesn’t, I’ll give it back.

*****

QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to control it.” – H.L. Mencken

*****

FEEL-OLD MOMENTS OF THE WEEK: Legendary coach and longtime ESPN football analyst Lee Corso turned 90 years old last week. Longtime Hollywood favorite Sam Elliott turned 81 over the past weekend. Actor/producer/director Robert De Niro turns 82 Sunday; and astronaut Jim Lovell, Commander of the challenging Apollo 13 space mission, died last week. He was 97 years old.

*****

BEST WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: On Monkey Island, Sundown Entertainment hosts Thursday night karaoke at Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La (6:00-9:00 p.m.) and Ryan Graham performs live Friday night at Doc’s. Downbeat will provide the music Saturday night at Eddy’s Lakeside Bar. There’s karaoke with Sundown Entertainment Wednesday night at The Monkey Bar, Rockstar Karaoke with DJ Kennedy Friday night, and live music by Magen Faulconer Saturday night. Lil’ Red and Sidepiece will be at The Shebang Friday night; and DJ K-Bandito will provide the entertainment Friday & Saturday nights at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze.

In Grove, Downbeat will provide the music Friday night at Cherokee Casino Grove’s 1897 Bar followed by 90 lb. Wrench Saturday night. Encore entertains Friday night at Grand Lake Casino’s Venue 655 followed by Wilkie Jay & Tony Saturday night. Morgan Entertainment leads the karaoke fun at Boom at The Regatta Friday night and hosts Singo competition Tuesday. There’s musical Bingo every Wednesday night at R-Bar Dance Hall & Saloon; and DJ Laidback Larry will provide the musical entertainment Saturday night at R-Bar.

On South Grand Lake, Magen Faulconer will be at Ugly’s Grill & Bar at Thunder Bay Marina Friday night. The Dillon Leggett Band will kick off the weekend Friday night at Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina followed by The Bad Decisions Band with Michelle Warren Saturday night. There’s plenty of live entertainment at Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney. Clint & Frank start the weekend early Wednesday night, followed by Clayton Ussery Thursday night, The Barrett Lewis Band Friday night, The Bison Band Saturday night, and Clayton Ussery again Sunday afternoon (4:00). Next week, Magen Faulconer will be live at Mooney’s Wednesday evening. Thursday night, there’s karaoke with Morgan Entertainment at Blind Swine Duck Creek. Quin Peterson entertains Saturday night at The Drunken Rooster in Cleora; and Lil’ Red & Sidepiece will be at Blind Swine next Tuesday evening. 

There are three nights of live music at Indigo Sky Casino beginning with Jon Dooley Thursday night. The GenXers take the stage Friday night, and Dirty Saints take over Saturday. Vixen will be on stage with a special performance Saturday night at Buffalo Run Casino’s Peoria Showplace, and Holly Crays will be at Buffalo Run’s Backwoods Bar. The Beer & Chicken Band will provide the music in Riverbend Casino’s Club 60 West Saturday night; and country music icon John Anderson will be live at Downstream Casino’s Pavillion Saturday night.

*****

DINING & DRINKING UPDATE: Cristobal’s Tamales food truck is now serving at The Monkey Bar Friday & Saturday nights (beginning at 8:00 p.m.). Rise-N-Dine in Ketchum is now serving dinner 5:00-10:00 p.m. Friday & Saturday and until 9:00 Sunday-Tuesday.

*****

BUM MUST-SEE TV: The Kingdom (a 6-part miniseries on the KC Chiefs) kicks off Thursday night at 8:00 on ESPN. The Rainmaker series debuts Friday night at 9:00 on USA and Peacock. Comedy icon Will Farrell will be the featured interview Sunday morning at 7:00 a.m. on Sunday Today on NBC.

*****

BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: There are LOTS of new movies being released this week: Shin Godzilla, Nobody 2, Highest 2 Lowest, Witchboard, Americana, and Jimmy and Stiggs all open in movie theaters this week.

*****

SAVE THE DATE: Thursday-Saturday, August 21-23 – Grove Pro Rodeo at Crosswired Cowboy Church (7:00 p.m.). Saturday, August 23 – 3rd Annual Battle of the Jeeps at the off-road area at Disney. Tuesday, August 26 – Grand Lake Newcomers Club Day Trip to America’s Outdoor Adventure Park (11:00-3:30). Friday-Sunday, August 29-31 – Jana Jae Fiddle Camp. Friday-Monday, August 29-Sept. 1 – Labor Day Crawl at the off-road area at Disney. Saturday, August 30 – Bullfest at the Lake at Wolf Creek Park in Grove (6:00-9:00 p.m.). Saturday, August 30 – Grand River Dam Paddle competition below the Pensacola Dam.  Thursday-Friday, September 4-5 – Lieutenant Governor Matt Pinnell’s “Luau on the Green” and Pinnell Classic Golf Tournament at Shangri-La. Monday, September 8 – Good Good Golf Battlefield Shootout at The Battlefield at Shangri-La followed by dinner with the Pros on Doc’s Patio at 7:00. Monday, September 8 – South Grand Lake Foundation “Fore the Kids” Golf Tournament at The Coves benefiting the Ketchum Warriors Backpack Program (9:00 a.m. shotgun).

*****

We’re rolling into Week #2 of the NFL preseason. You still probably won’t see a lot of the starting lineup players, but there are some good match-ups. Kansas City is at Seattle Friday night at 9:00, Cleveland is at Philadelphia Saturday at noon, the Cowboys host Baltimore Saturday night at 6:00, followed by the Broncos and Cardinals at 8:30. Sunday night’s featured game is Buffalo at Chicago. Washington hosts Cincinnati Monday night.

The WNBA has several great games this week, including Washington at Indiana Friday night (6:30) and Indiana at Connecticut Sunday (12:00). Las Vegas hosts Dallas Sunday afternoon (2:30) and Atlanta is at Golden State Sunday night (7:30).

On the PGA Tour, players are in Maryland this week for the BMW Championship. Coverage begins Thursday & Friday at 1:00, Saturday at noon & Sunday at 11:00 a.m. on the Golf Channel. NBC picks up coverage of the final two rounds Saturday at 2:00 & Sunday at 1:00.

NASCAR drivers are in Richmond this week for some Saturday night racing. Coverage of the Cook Out 400 is on USA Saturday night at 6:30.

There are some fun Major League Baseball games this week including Pittsburgh at the Chicago Cubs Saturday (1:00) followed by the Yankees at St. Louis (6:00). The Mets host Seattle Sunday night (6:00).

*****

Summertime is still a major fixture at Grand Lake this weekend. We’ll have sunshine with highs in the mid-90s and lows in the mid-70s. It’s another perfect summer weekend at the lake. There are plenty of really fun things happening this weekend; so get out and enjoy the summer weather we were hoping for in June! Remember, though, wherever you party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me!

GRAND LAKE BUM

If you would like to join the growing list of sponsors of The Grand Lake Bum e-blast and the Bum’s page on both  Grand Lake Living and www.360grandlake.com, the cost is only$50 a week and the list of readers continues to grow.  E-mail grandlakebum@gmail.com to sign up. The Grand Lake Bum column is also published in The Grand Laker newspaper.

Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

Anchor Sports Bar & Activity Park at Shangri-La

Big Shots on Monkey Island (Open Thursday, Friday & Saturday nights)

Billy’s Burger Bar & More in Ketchum

Blind Swine on Duck Creek at Safe Harbor Harbors View Marina

Blue Bluff Café at Blue Bluff Harbor

BOOM at The Regatta (at Sailboat Bridge)

Bradford BBQ in Ketchum

Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Casa Gutierrez in Gro

Cesar’s Place in Vinita

Cesar’s Place in Langley

Checkered Past in Grove

Chickanellas on Monkey Island

Chicken Coop west of Langley

Chubby’s Grill at On Target in Grove

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Copper Penny Bar in Ketchum

Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)

Cove Club in Langley

Cregan’s Confections & Ice Cream (Ketchum)

Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel

Domino’s in Grove

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Drift at the Regatta (at Sailboat Bridge in Grove)

Drunken Rooster Bar & Grill (Cleora)

Drunken Rooster – on the Water (Grove)

E&H Liquor Store at Littlefield Corner, Monkey Island

Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina

Fire Pit at Wildwood Cove Resort in Drowning Creek

Galley at The Anchor, Shangri-La Resort

Gambino’s Pizza in Ketchum

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Getaway Mercantile (north of Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lake Coffee Company in Grove

Hero’s Deli in Grove

Hero’s Deli in Langley

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Honey Creek BBQ in Grove (south of Honey Creek bridge)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Island Bar & Grill at The Landings Marina

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Keagan’s Coffee at Littlefield Corner

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Legacy Eatery in Grove

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Matt’s Place in Grove

Monkey Bar on Monkey Island

Monkey Island RV Resort

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney

Monkey Grind at Shangri-La Resort Hotel

Monkey Island Trail Rides

Monkey Island Winery

Mosa Hibachi and Sushi in Grove

Mulligan’s at Patricia Island Golf Club in Grove

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

One-Eyed Monkey at Littlefield Corner, Monkey Island

Pappy’s Bar on Hwy 10 east of Grove

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Pier 13 Liquor Store in Langley

Pistol Pat’s on Honey Creek in Grove

Pit Stop Café in Grove

Poppin’ on Grand in Cleora

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor

R Bar Dance Hall & Saloon in Grove

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Rise-N-Dine, Ketchum

River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island

Royal Liquor Store in Grove

Scissortail Lounge at Scissortail Marina

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina

South 125 Bar & Grill on Monkey Island

Speedy’s Chophouse in Grove

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

Sugar Shack at Lee’s Grand Lake Resort

Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island

The Artichoke Restaurant in Langley

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove